When Sheepdogs won't count sheep....

What do you do with a sheepdog that won't let you count sheep?

This is the first opportunity I've had to write in weeks. Well...without falling asleep on the keyboard, that is. I'm a little concerned that I may be indulging the risk of sleep-related electrocution if I perform a face-plant on the keyboard and drool happily into the electronic keypad while I'm snoozing. Oblivion only interests me if I can be sure that I'll be waking up when I'm supposed to! (The important part of that phrase was in italics-- it'll be clearer in the next paragraph!)

Part of the reason I've become almost narcoleptic at the keyboard lately is our crazy dog. (Aka BAD dog!) The fluffy one is now about 4 months old (-a toddler in dog years?!-)...and at this rate, I think his brain will have to double in size in order to maintain a pace relative to his extremely uncoordinated puppy body. *grin* The big hairball does not have a serious bone in his canine body, which has made discipline a surprising challenge. It's difficult to communicate a sense of guilt to an animal that KNOWS when you're trying not to laugh. "Bad Dog!" isn't nearly as effective when you're suppressing laughter, and he behaves like such a fruitcake and is SO playful that it's impossible to remain unaffected by it. The lunatic lately has decided to become somewhat nocturnal. In fact...the desire to play fetch seems MOST pronounced between 2 and 4AM. Oddly, this is usually when the occupants of this household prefer to sleep.

Even though his people-waking skills currently don't include barking, fetch is equally effective when it involves the retrieval of stolen blankets or pillows. (If you've never had a pillow jerked out from under your head while you slept, you haven't lived.) Having learned quickly that this method delivers instant results...Bad Dog has now graduated to the theft of miscellaneous articles of clothing during the day. Since he doesn't appear to require sleep and the sleep-deprived co-habitants of the household are usually only able to keep up sluggishly between yawning and unpredictable bouts of apnea, this is also an exhausting form of mischief! His favorite items to liberate from the laundry hamper have probably been chosen simply because they exist in a greater quantity than everything else: Cashmere likes to steal socks.

Moments ago...the Sock Monster (AKA Bad Dog!) returned to the cave-like space under the desk and gazed at me with a tantalizing expression: there was another sock hanging out of his mouth. (Apparently I've ignored him long enough and he wants to play "fetch" again. *SIGH*) Everywhere I go...I find socks! I could be living with a centipede and not have this many socks scattered throughout the house! I should probably be grateful that he hasn't made an effort to steal them WHILE we're wearing them....but I can't help but wonder if it's just a matter of time before we no longer have matching pairs to wear anyway! It's dinner time and I have a dog to chase, so I'm going to post this while I'm still awake. *grin*